Wednesday, August 16, 2006
Hi... why I never say lo? Because no mood. Why? Cause no business. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 ! Six days gone and still no business. Think maybe have to go back to my kampung to sell. In the past one day I can sell all, but today not bad, at least got 3 -.- Wait, I drink finish my milo first then continue talk.
Victim 6. Loading -- Unknown scout
Ok today as usual, went to Unity Secondary to deliver my kiam chye again. Nothing special, same old boring thing. And that Chinese food uncle's mouth still smells as bad as usual. I remember telling him to brush his teeth in the morning, but it was like donkey years ago. So don't find it strange if you see a guy wearing a face mask early in the morning in Unity, thats not a terrorist, thats me =) So I will always try my best to avoid his poisonous gas. Sometimes I wish to just stick one kiam chye into his mouth, but cannot. Stick into his mouth then how I sell? Save it for myself? -.- You all think what, wash wash then can eat ? Recycle? -.- The 3Rs Reuse, Reduce and Recycle? -.-
Ya so after fighting(his gas) for around 20 minutes, when I was about to leave, i saw a boy standing between two long long things. Oh thats the Singapore and school flags. Haha long time never go to school, almost forgot what those two long long things are. He then said "Unitians please stand up for the morning assembly." Shit ! Forgot how to sing the nation anthem ! Think of ways to run, turned left saw Mr Scotland, turned right saw Ms Cha Siew Piang, turned back was that uncle's bad breath. What the hell. Guess who's in front of me? Spooky Ng -.- Yea that look, really freaked me out. @_@ (crying) They forced me to sing, so I asked them whether I can sing the kiam chye song. They asked me what is kiam chye song.
Here it is ! The Kiam Chye Song !
I sell kiam chye, kiam chye kiam chye fresh fresh, everybody please come
come come and see, if you don't want to buy them never mind
if you don't buy, then you watch out
don't always go buy those ba gua
and don't always go buy those prawn
my kiam chye are all nice to eat
although they, are abit salty
but they are, very nice to eat
dont' always go buy those ba gua
and don't always go buy those prawns,
my kiam chye are all nice to eat
although they, are abit salty
but they are, very... nice... to EAT...
*clap clap*
All: IMPRESSIVE ! What about the pledge?
Erm, ya I got the Kiam Chye Pledge too, but before I wanted to say it, that unknown boy (he said he is from scouts) ya so that unknown scout said the national pledge before me. What the hell ! Kids nowadays are really rude. Can't they show some respect? Especially to me. Who I am? Uncle Kiam Chye of course ! You all can go ask around, all people know me.
*Suddenly that Mr Scotland took out a microphone and started walking around looking for peope, but don't why all ran away. -.- Think they thought he going to catch them for their atttire or hair again.*
*Then it was Ms Cha Siew Piang's turn. When she took the microphone and started asking people whether they know me, they instead asked her, "Who are you? The new toilet cleaner of Unity?" -.- Guess her auntie look don't really make her look like a principal.*
*Up next was Chinese food uncle. He don't need to move, as when he was about to do that everybody started to pack their bags and go home, including the teachers. Wow his breath is really damn powerful. Me fainting soon.*
*Finally was the Spookly Ng's turn ! But why am I so happy? Maybe I'm crazy. But one strange thing was she was not holding a microphone. Instead she was holding a huge stack of papers. One dropped onto the floor and I read the title. It says "Criticism Wet Market Maths Paper 1 and 2." No wonder... haha so again, I saw people running like mad to the safest place to avoid her eye contact. Remember this, always avoid eye contact with people. Why? Because if you don't, something magical will happen. Trust me, thats true. =) *
Get back to that scout. This was how he said the pledge.
We the citizens ofsingapore.
Pledgeourselvesasone unitedpeople
regardless of race, language or religion
Tobuildademocraticsociety
Base of justice andequality
Soastoachieve happinessprosperity andprogressforournation
What the hell was that? Machine gun reading style? Was there a need to take such a big breath to read those few words? Even me can do better than him. Watch
I, the seller of kiam chye
Treat my customers, as one untied people
Regardless of salt content, method, or hygiene
To produce the best kiam chye in the world
Price thats low and cheapest among all
So as to achieve happiness, prosperity, and progress for my business.
See ! Better right? heheh
Phew finally over, but just then a man in black walked towards me. Ohh Mr. D.J
Me: Hi D.J, what song you going to play next?
D.J: -.-?!
Me: Oops =x Nothing. hehe
D.J Ok well, can you please do me a favor?
Me: *Thinking inside -- You think you ask me to do a favor I will do is it? Of course not ! Me so busy, think I very free? Unless you pay me*
D.J: So is it possible?
Me: NO ! Ohh I mean YES ! Sure. ( @_@ ) crying
D.J: Help me take this document to Mr Arul. His is now in 4/5.
Me: *Thinking -- 4/5 again? Well ok*
Me: Ok no problem ! (actually got alot of problem)
D.J: Thanks.
Me: -.-
Victim 7. Loading -- Mr Argu ShinChan
Walk walk walk to 4/5, saw some pupils standing up. I wondered whats going on.
Mr Argu: You 4/5 pupils ! Yesterday I asked you all to join the Group 2 for AEP, and yet NONE of you turn up. I'm really very disappointed. What is wrong with you people. You all are now only taking one science subject, if you all don't want to help yourself, there is nothing I can do ! (He then started to ask some of them the reason for not coming)
Chey ! Not their AEP their go for what. Right? Plus he thinks his lessons very interesting? Look at his face I already know his lessons are damn boring. I can understand how those pupils feel. And he said he is disappointed, nobody asks him to feel disappointed what. If he wants to feel that way then go ahead, what for telling everyone his feelings. Plus he said what is wrong with those pupils? I think he is the one who's got something wrong. I heard from one pupils from 4/5 taking Biology that he wants everyone to finish the workbook, the 2 specimen papers, and study for the test next week. He thinks he can muti-task that means everyone can? The questions are so damn difficult. This is what that pupil told me. His name is Pasta Goal Jun Wei. I don't know, maybe he is just lazy to do. =x And guess what I saw, That Argu ShinChan took Pasta's scissors and spin and spin and spin. Impressive? I don't think so. Dangerous? Obviously ! What if it flies out and hit somebody? He is an adult ok, doesn't he knows that it is very dangerous to do such thing? Childish ! Immature ! You blacky ! Lame joker ! You suck ! hehe.
Decided not to give the document to him due to his sucking attitude and teaching style. On my way back to my van, I saw Mr. Oh Bee Hoon.
Victim 8. Loading -- Mr Oh Bee Hoon
He said he wanted to buy some kiam chye for his family. So in total it costs 2 bucks. (my son told me buck is more class than dollars ^^) As I was in a rush, I never counted the money and I just driven off. Guess what, he only gave me $1.99 -.- You scammer ! THIS IS NOT THE FIRST TIME YOU HAIRLESS GUY !
*Last time when I sold other things instead of kiam chye
1. Burger
Price: $1.50
Paid: $1.49
2. Nasi Lemak
Price: $1.30
Paid: $1.29
3. Curry Puff
Price: $0.40
Paid: $0.39
4. Wanton Noodle
Price: $1.40
Paid: $1.39
5. Fish and Chip
Price: $2.20
Paid: $2.19
6. Fried Been Hoon
Price: $0.70
Paid: $0.69
7. Economic Rice
Price: $1.60
Paid: $1.59
8. Drinks
Price: $0.50
Paid: $0.49
Latest !!
9. Kiam Chye
Price: $2.00
Paid $1.99
Ahhhhh !! the long list of debt !! When is he going to pay ?!?!?!!! Arghh need to record in my account book again. Waste my ink ! That idiot scammer ! Why always 1 cent short ?!?!?!!! He stingy HAIRLESS guy ! 1 cent also wants to save ! 1 cent also don't want to give me ! WHAT THE HELLLL !!! Somemore he always fail my son's Social Studies tests by 1 mark ! That IDIOT ! My son and I will choke and flood him to death with 1 cent coins !!! THAT SON OF A MONK !!!
{fainted} --- Hospitalise ---
~~~ ee yoor... ee yoor... ee yoor ~~~
We got new victim(s) !
at
9:32 AM
Hi... why I never say lo? Because no mood. Why? Cause no business. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 ! Six days gone and still no business. Think maybe have to go back to my kampung to sell. In the past one day I can sell all, but today not bad, at least got 3 -.- Wait, I drink finish my milo first then continue talk.
Victim 6. Loading -- Unknown scout
Ok today as usual, went to Unity Secondary to deliver my kiam chye again. Nothing special, same old boring thing. And that Chinese food uncle's mouth still smells as bad as usual. I remember telling him to brush his teeth in the morning, but it was like donkey years ago. So don't find it strange if you see a guy wearing a face mask early in the morning in Unity, thats not a terrorist, thats me =) So I will always try my best to avoid his poisonous gas. Sometimes I wish to just stick one kiam chye into his mouth, but cannot. Stick into his mouth then how I sell? Save it for myself? -.- You all think what, wash wash then can eat ? Recycle? -.- The 3Rs Reuse, Reduce and Recycle? -.-
Ya so after fighting(his gas) for around 20 minutes, when I was about to leave, i saw a boy standing between two long long things. Oh thats the Singapore and school flags. Haha long time never go to school, almost forgot what those two long long things are. He then said "Unitians please stand up for the morning assembly." Shit ! Forgot how to sing the nation anthem ! Think of ways to run, turned left saw Mr Scotland, turned right saw Ms Cha Siew Piang, turned back was that uncle's bad breath. What the hell. Guess who's in front of me? Spooky Ng -.- Yea that look, really freaked me out. @_@ (crying) They forced me to sing, so I asked them whether I can sing the kiam chye song. They asked me what is kiam chye song.
Here it is ! The Kiam Chye Song !
I sell kiam chye, kiam chye kiam chye fresh fresh, everybody please come
come come and see, if you don't want to buy them never mind
if you don't buy, then you watch out
don't always go buy those ba gua
and don't always go buy those prawn
my kiam chye are all nice to eat
although they, are abit salty
but they are, very nice to eat
dont' always go buy those ba gua
and don't always go buy those prawns,
my kiam chye are all nice to eat
although they, are abit salty
but they are, very... nice... to EAT...
*clap clap*
All: IMPRESSIVE ! What about the pledge?
Erm, ya I got the Kiam Chye Pledge too, but before I wanted to say it, that unknown boy (he said he is from scouts) ya so that unknown scout said the national pledge before me. What the hell ! Kids nowadays are really rude. Can't they show some respect? Especially to me. Who I am? Uncle Kiam Chye of course ! You all can go ask around, all people know me.
*Suddenly that Mr Scotland took out a microphone and started walking around looking for peope, but don't why all ran away. -.- Think they thought he going to catch them for their atttire or hair again.*
*Then it was Ms Cha Siew Piang's turn. When she took the microphone and started asking people whether they know me, they instead asked her, "Who are you? The new toilet cleaner of Unity?" -.- Guess her auntie look don't really make her look like a principal.*
*Up next was Chinese food uncle. He don't need to move, as when he was about to do that everybody started to pack their bags and go home, including the teachers. Wow his breath is really damn powerful. Me fainting soon.*
*Finally was the Spookly Ng's turn ! But why am I so happy? Maybe I'm crazy. But one strange thing was she was not holding a microphone. Instead she was holding a huge stack of papers. One dropped onto the floor and I read the title. It says "Criticism Wet Market Maths Paper 1 and 2." No wonder... haha so again, I saw people running like mad to the safest place to avoid her eye contact. Remember this, always avoid eye contact with people. Why? Because if you don't, something magical will happen. Trust me, thats true. =) *
Get back to that scout. This was how he said the pledge.
We the citizens ofsingapore.
Pledgeourselvesasone unitedpeople
regardless of race, language or religion
Tobuildademocraticsociety
Base of justice andequality
Soastoachieve happinessprosperity andprogressforournation
What the hell was that? Machine gun reading style? Was there a need to take such a big breath to read those few words? Even me can do better than him. Watch
I, the seller of kiam chye
Treat my customers, as one untied people
Regardless of salt content, method, or hygiene
To produce the best kiam chye in the world
Price thats low and cheapest among all
So as to achieve happiness, prosperity, and progress for my business.
See ! Better right? heheh
Phew finally over, but just then a man in black walked towards me. Ohh Mr. D.J
Me: Hi D.J, what song you going to play next?
D.J: -.-?!
Me: Oops =x Nothing. hehe
D.J Ok well, can you please do me a favor?
Me: *Thinking inside -- You think you ask me to do a favor I will do is it? Of course not ! Me so busy, think I very free? Unless you pay me*
D.J: So is it possible?
Me: NO ! Ohh I mean YES ! Sure. ( @_@ ) crying
D.J: Help me take this document to Mr Arul. His is now in 4/5.
Me: *Thinking -- 4/5 again? Well ok*
Me: Ok no problem ! (actually got alot of problem)
D.J: Thanks.
Me: -.-
Victim 7. Loading -- Mr Argu ShinChan
Walk walk walk to 4/5, saw some pupils standing up. I wondered whats going on.
Mr Argu: You 4/5 pupils ! Yesterday I asked you all to join the Group 2 for AEP, and yet NONE of you turn up. I'm really very disappointed. What is wrong with you people. You all are now only taking one science subject, if you all don't want to help yourself, there is nothing I can do ! (He then started to ask some of them the reason for not coming)
Chey ! Not their AEP their go for what. Right? Plus he thinks his lessons very interesting? Look at his face I already know his lessons are damn boring. I can understand how those pupils feel. And he said he is disappointed, nobody asks him to feel disappointed what. If he wants to feel that way then go ahead, what for telling everyone his feelings. Plus he said what is wrong with those pupils? I think he is the one who's got something wrong. I heard from one pupils from 4/5 taking Biology that he wants everyone to finish the workbook, the 2 specimen papers, and study for the test next week. He thinks he can muti-task that means everyone can? The questions are so damn difficult. This is what that pupil told me. His name is Pasta Goal Jun Wei. I don't know, maybe he is just lazy to do. =x And guess what I saw, That Argu ShinChan took Pasta's scissors and spin and spin and spin. Impressive? I don't think so. Dangerous? Obviously ! What if it flies out and hit somebody? He is an adult ok, doesn't he knows that it is very dangerous to do such thing? Childish ! Immature ! You blacky ! Lame joker ! You suck ! hehe.
Decided not to give the document to him due to his sucking attitude and teaching style. On my way back to my van, I saw Mr. Oh Bee Hoon.
Victim 8. Loading -- Mr Oh Bee Hoon
He said he wanted to buy some kiam chye for his family. So in total it costs 2 bucks. (my son told me buck is more class than dollars ^^) As I was in a rush, I never counted the money and I just driven off. Guess what, he only gave me $1.99 -.- You scammer ! THIS IS NOT THE FIRST TIME YOU HAIRLESS GUY !
*Last time when I sold other things instead of kiam chye
1. Burger
Price: $1.50
Paid: $1.49
2. Nasi Lemak
Price: $1.30
Paid: $1.29
3. Curry Puff
Price: $0.40
Paid: $0.39
4. Wanton Noodle
Price: $1.40
Paid: $1.39
5. Fish and Chip
Price: $2.20
Paid: $2.19
6. Fried Been Hoon
Price: $0.70
Paid: $0.69
7. Economic Rice
Price: $1.60
Paid: $1.59
8. Drinks
Price: $0.50
Paid: $0.49
Latest !!
9. Kiam Chye
Price: $2.00
Paid $1.99
Ahhhhh !! the long list of debt !! When is he going to pay ?!?!?!!! Arghh need to record in my account book again. Waste my ink ! That idiot scammer ! Why always 1 cent short ?!?!?!!! He stingy HAIRLESS guy ! 1 cent also wants to save ! 1 cent also don't want to give me ! WHAT THE HELLLL !!! Somemore he always fail my son's Social Studies tests by 1 mark ! That IDIOT ! My son and I will choke and flood him to death with 1 cent coins !!! THAT SON OF A MONK !!!
{fainted} --- Hospitalise ---
~~~ ee yoor... ee yoor... ee yoor ~~~
We got new victim(s) !
at
9:32 AM
Market Vendors
we see. we experience.
we unhappy. we criticise.
Uncle Kiam Chye
Has been selling kiam chye for 16 years.
Uncle Ba Gua
Has been selling ba gua for 16 years too.
Uncle Salad Sia
Has been selling sia(prawn) for 16 years also.
Poll of the Week
Uncles and aunties
Auntie Sie
Auntie Cai
Uncle Kwek
Uncle Hui
Auntie Kueh
Uncle Lim Peh
Uncle Fi
Auntie Seok
Auntie Ying
Auntie Stepf
Auntie Wei
Auntie Ting
Auntie Yan
Kopitiam Chit-Chat
credits
aprileap-
we see. we experience.
we unhappy. we criticise.
Uncle Kiam Chye
Has been selling kiam chye for 16 years.
Uncle Ba Gua
Has been selling ba gua for 16 years too.
Uncle Salad Sia
Has been selling sia(prawn) for 16 years also.
Poll of the Week
Uncles and aunties
Auntie Sie
Auntie Cai
Uncle Kwek
Uncle Hui
Auntie Kueh
Uncle Lim Peh
Uncle Fi
Auntie Seok
Auntie Ying
Auntie Stepf
Auntie Wei
Auntie Ting
Auntie Yan
Kopitiam Chit-Chat
credits
aprileap-